Monday, May 19, 2008

Chapter One Part One: The Beginning

The story began long ago, in a land far, far away. Well no, not really. Fairytales begin that way and they end with a happily ever after. I’m sorry to say that this is not fairytale. It does not begin or end happily. This tale is different.

Our story begins in an August day, still a dreadful summer month. Layne Winters is waiting for her plane to takeoff, counting the seconds and minutes for her departure from Los Angeles to suburban Detroit.
“Ahhh, Detroit, the wonderland of nothing but a god forsaken place.” she thought to herself.
It was not her, who chose to go live in Detroit, her parents had just died and she was being forced to go live with her twenty-nine year old sister, Zelya. Who was more a stranger than a sister. Zelya had moved away when Layne was only five years old and she can’t recall a good memory with her. There had been one time, when Zelya had actually looked at her instead of just ignoring her as if she was nothing but a ghost. Of course, only to throw her out her room but it was just the same. Those were the good old days.
As she sat on the airport waiting chair starring at the people passing by, she wondered what went through their minds as they walked by with blank faces only looking forward. Are they scared, worried, or are some just nothing but blank? She envied them. She longed to be one of those people who just moved forward with blank minds and blank thoughts. Instead she stayed in her mind wondering and wondering about anything, everything. Why must she go through this? What point is there to ask these questions?

She boarded the plane and sat still like a statue on her seat. She couldn’t sleep. She didn’t want to sleep. She never had dreams only thoughts, endless thoughts with questions that longed for answers. She stayed quiet, only looking out the window, hardly living, barely seeming alive.
Ever since her parents died, she’s changed. She wondered why, she was never that close to her mom or her dad. In fact, she never spoke to them. There was no reason to, she received high grades and never got in trouble, it just seemed like there was never a need to talk to them.
What would life have been if she and her parents had only been closer? Would she have been happier? She always blamed herself for their death, even though there had never been a reason to. Still something inside her felt guilty, something that she knew would never go away.
It seemed like she was only on the plane for a couple of moments, but the hours had passed by like seconds. She exited the plane and picked up her bags. She had never been a big fan of airports, they seemed empty and hollow and as she walked through the halls, she wished she wasn’t there. As long as she could remember, she had always had a feeling that she always being watched. She was never sure of it but it was one of those feelings, she was very paranoid about.
Finally, she arrived to the end, only to see Zelya waiting for her. Zelya was standing there impatiently, looking up with her long, curly, black hair tide into a pony tail. As usual, she had not noticed Layne standing in front of her. Layne didn’t bother saying hello. She didn’t want to distract her sister who seemed as if she were going through her plans of the day through her head. Somehow looking at her sister had not brought any happy feelings to her.
“Is that normal? “ Layne thought to herself.
After a couple minutes passed by, Zelya had at last realized that Layne was standing there. Startled she said, “Geez, why didn’t you say you were right there?”
“I’m sorry, you just seemed busy.”
“Well don’t do that, its weird.”
It was silent then.
Seeing that it was an awkward moment, Zelya finally said, “Anyway, welcome home!”
Questions were spinning through Layne’s head as she stood there looking at her sister. “Is this how it’s going to be all the time? Filled with awkward silences?”
Layne only forced a smile. But it was not real. It didn’t matter. All she could think was that nothing could change this. This was where it was going to begin. This is home now.

5 comments:

Rachelle said...

nice writings and poems and stuff, but explore the topic, and its injustice in the society, i know people get depressed, i know everybody gets depressed, but explore how it happens and why, why do people just sink into a little burrow for the winter instead of socializing to many people who feel the exact same way. is it a lack of communications? lack of true friendships? the depressed always feel they are isolated and alienated from everybody else, which is selfish and ignorant of the real idea they don't want to see, but are there other factors, so it is not his or her fault when he or she does so? if you do that, i'm sure it could be really interesting and a great blog.

Louis said...

Nice blog! I agree with rachel, explore the topic some more and think outside the box. Go into more detail about how it happens and why. Anyway, nice blog, and i am excited about reading more!

Desire B. said...

I love the topic...but i was kind of confused about what i was reading. Did you write this yourself? If so very very nice writing. I would love to read more about Layne, she seems really interesting. Maybe if you go more in detail about your writing and let your reader know, whether they are reading something you wrote or if its something reseach or a story your going by. Besides that very nice work...keep it up!

Tears for Human Rights said...

is this leading to the definition of depression? because so far with the poem and this story it just tells about a girl who had depression. anyway, it's very strong. you should add facts and statistics about depressed people and abilities they contain or avoid like speaking their mind, because Layne sounds like she doest really speak her mind.

George said...

Thank you for the comment on my blog. I have not updated it for a few months now and don't plan to. I started writing as therapy to help me work through my depression and it definitely helped.

I may take a very simplistic view of depression versus those who look 12 levels deep for a reason. In my opinion it is nothing more than a chemical imbalance in my brain. That imbalance allows and even promotes the horrible feelings we live with ... the lack of self worth, uselessness, death being better than life, etc.

Therapy and chemicals almost make me feel like I belong, like I am a part of humanity even though I live almost zombie-like. No happy highs but no terrible lows is not the best way to be but it is better than living on the fine edge of a razor blade.